~ read.

I'm now running on Life v0.33

I finally got around to downloading and installing patch v0.33 recently released by The Developer. So far, I was only able to give the tires a few kicks and hardly noticed anything different from v0.32.

However, according to other players who have experience running v0.33, I should expect these changes to affect gameplay and take some getting used to as I go through the main quest line more.

Below are the personalized release notes for v0.33 of my character. I see some welcome improvements listed here but, at this juncture, I'm not too sure how to feel about some of the changes The Developer made to my main character's stats. I guess I will have to do a a few quests and make some progress with the main quest line first before I could comment on how these affect game play.

Release notes for Life Patch v0.33

Changes to the main character's base stats

  • INT +5 - Plese note that the INT improvements or penalties varies from player-to-player and is contingent upon the number of tomes read and new spells/skills learned by your main character going through the main quest line while playing on v0.32
  • PER -7 - on v0.33, penalties to PER can be reduced or, in some cases, reversed by vistiing the Cataract Surgeon NPC and purchasing the LASIK Perk if your character has at least 3 gazillion credits. Alternatively, you can equip your character with the Spectacle accessory for a minor PER improvement as with recent versions.
  • STR -3 - STR penalties are inversely proportional to the time your character spends playing the Gym mini game.
  • Endurance -5 -Endurance penalties are inversely proportional to the time your character spends playing the Cycling mini game.
  • Speech +8 - You can further improve speech by successfully completing Public Speaking side quests.
  • AGI -5 - AGI penalties are irreversible and mandatory for every version upgrade.
  • Charisma -6 - Charisma can be improved by purchasing and equipping popular armor as voted upon by the community. Charisma penalties or improvements are calculated based on the popularity of the armor you have in your inventory while playing v0.32
  • Luck +7 - Luck penalties or improvents are calculated based on the number of NPCs you've met and possess positive opinion of you as you go through the main quest line.

NPC updates

  • Companion 1 (Wife; joined your party when you completed the romance story line in v0.28) has been updated to v0.39
  • Companion 2 (Son; joined your party in v0.30) has been updated to v0.02


  • Your Character's Gold Per Month has increased This was due to a combination of you leveling up to LVL 89 while you were playing as a Corporate Drone class then changing to a Freelance Consultant class. As with previous versions, the latter class comes with the Creative Taxation Perk in addition to an increase in your character's base Gold Per Month value.

    Note: Characters playing on the 3rd world server who earn Gold by completing quests for clans who are on the 1st world server will continue to earn Gold at a rate consistent with the 1st world server settings.

  • Your monthly upkeep has increased The main driver of this increase is a known bug on the v0.02 update to Companion 2 (son) where merchants sell the diaper armor and the milk potion-- in-game items required for companion 2 to remain in your party-- 300% more than they should be selling. The Developer is aware of this issue and is working on a fix.

    Other things that drove up your monthly upkeep include the vehicle you acquired during the Do we really need a new car? quest and the castle you acquired back in v.27.

Bug fixes

  • Fixed a bug where your character consistently got hundreds of PVP requests a day from players on the 1st world server because of a server glitch that made everyone aggro towards the clan your character was affiliated with.

  • Fixed a bug where your character and Companion 1(wife) got into random PVP matches with each other because of bugs related to muting Companion 1's audio.

  • Fixed a bug where your character model remained portly even after grinding away at the Cycling mini game.

  • Fixed a bug related to your character refusing to engage in the Cycling mini game after taking considerable fall damage in v.031

Gameplay changes

  • max-videogame-hours-perweek has been reduced to 4
  • max-erection-time-minutes has been reduced to 7
  • Critical hit (stroke) chance has been increased by 33% (mutiplier in effect as your character has a nicotine addiction)
  • The "Beer with friends after work" perk has been nerfed.
  • max-me-time-hours-perweek has been reduced to 3
  • attractiveness-to-female-npcs has been reduced to 0.00014

New Armor and Accessories Unlocked

Forlorn pouch of disheartenment. Can be combined with any smartphone in your inventory. +5dexterity, -20 Charisma

Despondent Shoes of Despair +5 comfort, -15 Charisma

Repugnant shorts of solitude +5 comfort, -5 Charisma

Malignant Mojaves of Misogyny +15 PER during daytime, -10 Charisma

Bandit Glasses of Blur +10 PER, -15 Charisma

Developer Version Summary

Enjoy hardcore mode, bitch.

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